“…To Fail and a reintroduction”
To fail conjures thoughts and emotions that would usually be negative. Even I cannot argue that point. What if I told you there are times when not failing is even worse than actually failing? You would probably ask me how that was possible or flatly not believe me. Let me explain this phenomenon by first focusing on the title of this, just the beginning. To fail, is only half a thought, the full thought is “too afraid to fail.”
Let’s take a moment to really think about that. Too afraid to fail.. Have you ever been so afraid to try anything that you didn’t even attempt to make it happen or give any real effort at all? If we do a pro-con analysis there would actually be a few pros for this. You never actually fail at anything and therefore never experience the disappointment and pain that failure brings. However, there are quite a few more cons than those 2 pros.
First you would never challenge yourself to see what you’re made of and what are truly capable of. Next even though you would never fail, would you ever really succeed at anything? By not doing or attempting anything you would achieve anything then where you are currently are. A few of you may be ok with this, but for the majority of us there are still milestones we want to achieve or new goals to meet.
Wayne Gretzky once said, “You miss 100 % of the shots don’t take.” That quote actually measures my opinion of not giving an effort very closely. We can continue with more cons. You would probably never have any self-improvement or change. You would probably never learn anything new both of yourself or general knowledge.
Some of the biggest lessons learned by the most successful of us have risen from the ashes of our failures. Michael Jordan was cut from his varsity basketball team his freshman year, a widely known story of the GOAT. Many authors were near broke or broke before their big breaks. There are countless stories of those that took years to achieve success and had to endure endless failures to finally find the sweet taste of success.
Our final con let me begin with a question for you. Can you truly enjoy the feelings and emotions of success if you never failed? If you have never experienced any hardship, sadness, failure, etc, I wish I were you. In all seriousness maybe you could experience the pure satisfaction of success, but I believe to truly appreciate and feel success you need to experience failure. Knowing what it is like at the bottom helps you realize just how hard it is to succeed and allows us to understand just how important it is for us to succeed.
Which brings us full circle to being too afraid to fail, after that analysis are you still going to play it safe on the sidelines or check into this game of life and go for broke? Am I telling you that you are going to succeed the first time or often even if you give it your all? Absolutely not. In reality you will probably fail more often then you will succeed. Then why even try? If no one tries there will be nothing. No new babies, no medical breakthroughs, no new music; nothing only what we have already, and that sounds like a terrible world to live in.
You see my friends as bad as failing is; there is a beautiful aspect to failing. Failing especially when you give your all, your whole heart will feel like death. But you know what? You didn’t die, you gave it all up only for it to not be enough, and you’re still rising. No I’m not even saying standing, sometimes it will knock you fully down, you may have to climb to even get back to your knees, and then work your way back up to stand and face the world again. Don’t forget though, you took it; you took the world’s best shot and got back up. Failing shows us exactly what we are made and just how resilient are bodies and souls can be. Failing allows us to become stronger and brace for the next fight. Eventually through all the bumps and bruises we will breakthrough and find our success.
I won’t lie to you it won’t be easy, and I am just as guilty as anyone, if not the most guilty of all. I have been too afraid to try in relationships, my professional life, friendships, hobbies, writing; name it I have been far too afraid to even try, or if I did “give an effort” it was in word only or I intentionally sabotaged myself. Whether it is waiting too long to tell someone how I feel or using my pursuit of perfection to hinder my writing, I have been the worst at not living life to its fullest. I am trying to fix this with myself, and I encourage all of you reading this to do the same. The first way to break out of my isolation and box I have put myself in, is by starting to write again. This piece is only 1 day short of a full year since my last post. I am going to do my best to produce more pieces and on a regular basis, I want you all to hold me accountable, and make me deliver.
That brings us to the second half of the title of this piece, “and a reintroduction.” In the famous words of Shawn Carter aka Jay-Z, “Allow me to re-introduce myself.” For those of you unfamiliar with me, I am Coty Myers, an aspiring writer. I have failed at even writing this post since it came to me two weeks ago. But in that failure I found the inspiration to begin again. I have several pieces that have been stuck in my head for nearly a year, and I intend to write them now. They won’t be perfect, they may even be downright awful, but that is thing about writing, you just have to write. I also have started work on my first book, “Confession of a Dying Twenty-Something.”
Progress on the book is slow, but I am hoping reviving this blog will allow my creativeness to begin flowing again. I ask you to please continue to support me, and pressure me to continue to produce pieces you enjoy reading, so feel free to provide me with subjects you’d like to see me write about. Enough self promoting, and back to this topic to wrap us up for now.
I am going to fail daily, but I am going to do my best to dust myself off and try again, in whatever it may be. I implore you to do the same. Failure is just a part of success, and we all need to give effort every day. I will leave you with someone who saw the deepest failures, but even higher success, Steve Jobs.
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
Never be too afraid to try,
M. Coty Myers